The Physics of Love?

A brilliantly hilarious sitcom

It makes logical sense that my favourite TV show is devoted to the lives of two theoretical physicists.  And after two great seasons, I still think back to the several science jokes, mythological references, philosophical debates, and social mishaps that provide the show with its unique charm.  I find it amazing and really rewarding to find a problem able to project its humour out to the so-called ‘nerds‘ and ‘geeks‘ of our world while still maintaining a pop culture appeal.  But perhaps the underlying factor that really keeps me posted to the show is the potentially grim realization that this may be exactly how my own future pans out.

Now, with the current path I’m taking in life, it is highly probable that I will become a crazy physics researcher like the two main characters of the show, Sheldon and Leonard.  For those who have seen the show, it is the arrogant, controlling, and oddly oblivious Sheldon who often steals many of the show’s scenes.  However, it is Leonard who I can really relate to, likely because he aims to develop a more balanced lifestyle.  And when it comes down to it, the premise that I can really relate to is his quest to develop a relationship with Penny (the sexy Kaley Cuoco, formerly of “8 Simple Rules for Dating My Teenage Daughter“).  Like Leonard, I forsee identical obstacles in trying to form a closer relationship with someone for whom I feel deep affection.  And it’s interesting that despite making great scientific achievements, having a fun core group of friends, and partaking in so many hobbies from video games to paintball to comic books, Leonard still has this void in his life.

But obviously, I’m sure 95% of you believe that you eventually need a romantic companion, and thus you should always devote some time for this goal.  And I do agree, but the search for this ‘love‘ or ‘soulmate‘ often becomes a primary motivation in our lives.  However, I feel that embarking upon this conquest at this time is not the best idea.  And I think the high school relationship serves as a prime example.  During this time people ‘hook up‘ for the sake of, well, hooking up.  Oftentimes it is not based on compatibility, but rather a raw physical attraction, or the fact that one party has a vulnerable neediness.  This is evident in the overdramatic nature of several break-ups.  I know many girls who must always have a guy by their side to feel comfortable and accepted, and likewise I know many guys who feel inferior unless they have that girlfriend like everyone else.  Herein lies the classic example of peer pressure tied in with adolescent confusion.

Okay, but of course it is fine to experiment! We’re teens, we should have that liberty to learn about others and learn about ourselves through the context of dating, and even more.  Nevertheless, at this point of time, a divergence suddenly emerges in the style of sociological relations of men.  I cannot speak for girls, heck I can seldom understand girls.  So for guys, it’s the clear distinction of ‘jerks‘ and ‘nice guys.’  Don’t get me wrong, I know some really amazing and inspiring guys, who in a social context with girls will act like ‘jerks.’  They will do this because in high school, the ‘jerk‘ mentality is the superior method in achieving the goal that every guy desires, which is the girl.  The problem is because this methodology works, they are enabled to continue this type of lifestyle in the future.  Whereas, the ‘nice guy‘ bringing in all their morals and integrity into their social game are then shunned by the girl because they simply don’t have that appeal.

I know what you’re thinking though.  If you’re a nice guy, “well I’m a nice guy, and I do perfectly well” or if you’re a girl, “I never fall for jerks!”  But here, we really have to think about the premise of attraction.  Whereas we all claim to act or behave in a specific manner, our mind will work differently.  I feel it always comes down, “we want what we can’t have,” which is the basis of why so many of us have crushes on celebrities.  People are appealed to what is different, what is mysterious, what is exciting.  Nobody likes boredom, especially not teenagers who would rather be excited than comfortable.  It is for this reason, that people have to project exuberant social images to gain that attraction.  For example a guy will work out excessively, wear designer clothing, or act especially aloof, and a girl will lather on excessive make-up, become especially flirty, or wear revealing clothing.  These are all mechanisms to appear more appealing.  But we ALL do it, because this is how we will survive socially, Social Darwinism again.  And because the initial attraction has this fake pretense, this is the sole reason why ‘high school’ relationships flounder so quickly.  But maybe all of this is wrong, perhaps I’m just creating all these theories to cover up my own short-comings.  Heck, I’ll never be as suave as UFC fighter Rampage Jackson, like in this hilarious video.

But this is exactly where it comes back to me and Leonard.  He is one of the most intelligent people in the world, capable of creating even greater theories than I am, yet he falls under the same category as me.  But like I stated, perhaps instead of existing within several relationships, our personalities are suited such that we can discover ourselves much better through our introspection and immersing ourselves within our work. All you really need is one, that one love, that one person that you can really live with and be happy with.  When I’m 50 years old, it won’t matter if I’ve had intimate relationships with 100 women or 1 women, as long as I am entirely in love with the woman I am sitting next to until my own age.

Thus as young adults, we should start adopting a new mentality.  We shouldn’t let the effort to find that significant other cloud our own visions and jugments.  Instead, we should focus upon our individual, independent aspirations.  We’re all reaching for that happy and successful life, so we should owe that ‘experimentation’ phase to what we are truly about.  If this does mean meeting lots of random men or women, then that’s your lifestyle, and I respect that.  However, if that isn’t who you are, don’t make yourself into that other person.  I believe these people are called ‘tools‘ or ‘posers‘ or another negative connotation for good reason.  Just be yourself, whoever that may be, and revel in your self-created world!  If the world around you is your own world, then nothing but good can come from it. 🙂

Peace and love!! 😀

PS. In the meanwhile, have a taste in my world, and see if you really do enjoy The Big Bang Theory: